It's one of those days..

Let me first and foremost declare that I'm not in the right frame of mind at the moment. (note that i mentioned "frame" not "state" so I'm not that crazy)

I haven't been feeling so well the whole day, and I made a stupid mistake before coming home this evening that left me feeling down the rest of the day. It's the second time. Second time I've recharged quite an amount to the wrong number! Forgive me if I seem too furious over something that seem quite small, but I feel like kicking myself in the butt because I feel stupid for having done the same mistake twice! *sigh*

Anyway, what can I do? It would be naive of me to expect other people to be honest about it (although I know I would be honest xp), but I gave the number a miscall anyway (just to make myself feel better) and the person called me back. He seemed to have understood a bit but we had communication problem (he doesn't seem to speak english). He asked for my name in Hindi, but I don't think that was necessary so I left him a message explaining that it was a mistake, the shopkeeper recharged his number with a certain amount that should've been recharged to mine, and if he could be so kind as to replace that by recharging the same amount to my number I would be ever so thankful. The result? Nothing until now..

Oh well, at least I tried, but deep in my mind I really feel like shouting *%#$*! just when I needed money the most! (feeling down again) It's end of the month and I've bills to pay plus I have to save up if I were to go back during the holidays. Ah, I shouldn't have recharged my phone. I was contemplating against doing that earlier. I should've just let my credit go 0.00 before recharging it huhu. Still, I decided to invest some of my budget into my phone usage! I thought I'd save a bit by recharging a lesser amount than I usually do but I ended up paying the same amount for lesser recharge value..wuuaaahhhhh.. Hm, let's hope the money I wasted on other people is for a good cause. Who knows the person really needed it and he has a sick family member or something, whom he badly needs to call...huhuhu..i'll pretend it's that way then (cheating herself again, way to go!)

Anyway, that was a bit emotional huh. I'm a bit miserable today because I have sudden loss of appetite. I, a person whom likes to eat is now finding almost everything distasteful. What is wrong with me? I get this nauseating feeling even when I hear other people mention bread, noodles or anything huehue, and it gets worse after eating. I've been feeling somewhat nauseous for the past 2 days. I don't know why.

I think what I need is green mango ;p my friend mentioned that today and so far that's the only thing that doesn't make me think of throwing up (apart from sushi). Oh well, i think i'll be fine though because I haven't been vomiting, nor do I have loose motions, dizziness or abdominal pain. I just discovered one of my housemates feels the same way too today. I hope I become normal again soon. Maybe by tomorrow? As much as not eating may be good for my purse but I'd rather have my appetite back, thank you. Of course, it should be in moderation ^^ (i do not wish to be the person who gets hungry every 2 hours ;p).

signing off.

-she's getting back to the harsh realities of the world now-

A new beginning..

It's 2010! Although it might seem a little bit late, i still would like to wish Happy New Year! to everyone..

2 weeks had gone by since new year's day. This year i celebrated my new year's day in the airport just like how i spent my Christmas Day (huehue). Still, it was an experience and I am happy (^^). I was grateful i wasn't alone the entire day though. I'd like to thank those whom kept me company during some moments of the day.

Thinking back, I haven't taken time to reflect on the year that has passed and so this post is going to be one of those. To summarize, 2009 was a year that has offered me lots of experience and knowledge. I thoroughly enjoyed some parts of it and struggled a bit in others. Yet, they were all good experiences, from which i learnt a lot. I thank God immensely for all the blessings He has showered me with, for guiding and keeping me safe no matter where I am, and also for the bond and times I shared with my loved ones. I met a lot of people whom I learnt a lot from, and for that I'm also grateful.

One lesson that I'm often reminded of in 2009 is this:- No matter where I go, and in times when I feel down, I found that there are some kind people around whom offered me assistance, company or even just a smile; and I felt that things are going to be alright. They may be someone i know or they may even be a stranger but it gave me hope, even if just a little, that good people still exist, no matter how bad or how stressful and frustrating the world seemed to be. Most importantly, it gave me the strength and inspiration to continue to be kind to others and to be patient even when the world is not being kind to me. Isn't life more meaningful that way? Of course, being kind doesn't mean that you let the world trample over you but that's a different thing - there are times and places where we have to be cautious and alert.

Here comes 2010, marking a new beginning. Sure some challenges are heading my way, the final exam and postings at a new hospital to begin with, but with challenges come experiences, knowledge and the opportunity to become a better person, which i hope i will be. Hey, it looks like I just got myself a new year resolution :D What had I done so far? Yes, I didn't write down any new year resolution but I've had a haircut, cleaned and rearranged furnitures in my room, and organized my desk and wardrobe. I can't promise i'll be a wonderful person throughout the year, but i'll try my best ;p

So here's cheers to everyone, for a new beginning and the wonderful experiences to come. Cheers!